i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
