I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
