Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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