Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I AM VODKA MAN
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize