He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
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You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
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If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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