No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
