? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
