I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Holy shit dude........stairs
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
