quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
