Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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