gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
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