she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize