i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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