how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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