The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize