If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize