This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
