who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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