They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
