My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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