someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
