Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize