You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
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He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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