There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
