North Korea, Best Korea!
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
