just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
