porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
