This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize