I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
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