After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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