all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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