so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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