I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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