shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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