Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize