We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize