oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
