Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
