just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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