I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
