I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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