People in love make me want to vomit
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just want to make out with him forever
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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