Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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