I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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