just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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