btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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