im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
