dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
