i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
