I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize